Swing Baby
It can be tough to stay focused on the present while writing about the past. Being up North, my focus was solely on Mr. Wilderness. The way I managed my time did not permit me to share with you. Thinking back to that night on the beach in Mexico with BBLA, it feels like a lifetime ago when in fact it’s only been weeks since I was breathing in the saltwater air. I’ll see his posts on social media and briefly I’m reminded of our fun; how he had me on the sand, my jeans around my ankles, bent over while he ate me from behind.
We’d driven until the road would go no more and all we could see was the sand and the Pacific Ocean. He’d shared about his hope for his last relationship and how it would have created space for multiple partners, yet even though his ex was bisexual and he considers himself queer, they ended up defaulting to the monogamous norm.
BBLA was charming in that beat up, surfer-artist kind of way. His shoulder-length hair bleached out from the sun and the ocean water, his skin tanned from a lifetime spent outdoors. The night ended back in my apartment with him asking me to stick my ribbed dildo in his ass. He asked with such conviction that I didn’t take it slow. It wasn’t until after the sex ended that he revealed it was his first time trying something like that. I left Mexico a week later and didn’t see him again. Can you still call it a one night stand if you’ve texted and follow each other on social media?
Leaving BBLA in the past, I look now to the future. The more open Mr. Wilderness and I are regarding the nature of our relationship, the more I see the need to be transparent about our way of loving each other. In the North we are an anomaly; living in a region with more land, more farms and more animals than people, means that we’ve decided to ‘move slow’ when it comes to sharing the fact that we are in a committed, non-monogamous relationship. After all, we wouldn’t want to be pigeonholed as ‘those people’ in the way everyone refers to our neighbors as “the swingers,” insert eye roll here. My only question about our neighbors is, “How cute are they?”
The answer? Stay tuned.